After a long absence I am back on LJ and am getting around to introducing and re-introducing myself to LJ's vampire communities. Hello everybody! I'm Cynthya BrianKate. I'm a transgender-identified intersex (though I prefer the older word hermaphrodite) lady psychic vampire who also happens to be otherkin. I currently live in Long Island, NY. I'm looking for some vampire community that's trans-friendly, intersex-friendly and also otherkin-friendly. I'd love to know if anybody on here is in NY, as I'd love to know some other folks, but am looking forward to hearing from any of y'all! --thanks, Cynthya
I hate my period. Every time I come around to this time of the month I start feeling really energetically drained. And more than that, I feel a little sick. And I become extremely sensitive to light at this time. I don't like light as it is, but during my period, I have to turn the brightness down on my computer screen as well.
The first two days are always the worst and then after that I start feeling better. I wonder if there is something I could do to just get past these first two days a little better.
An interesting article that shows up on House Kheprian's web site. I've done some research on the web and as I find really interesting and hopefully valid links, I'll post them for others to look at as well.
I conducted a deep feed last night with a friend of mine. More than that, it was an experiment in energy exchange. So I drank deeply of his energy, but in turn I channeled the energy through me and processed it into a purer, higher form, then cycled it back to him. I don't know that I can explain how it happened, it was more of an intuitive thing. Needless to say, I felt great all day long today, even if class was boring and long. And tonight I still feel good.
It's amazing how things are when you find a good partner to feed from, they are aware of what you are doing, and their energy tastes good to you. It is a far longer lasting and overall better feed than one could ever get from wild card feeding or ambient energy feeding. Though either can sustain, the true sustaining energy comes from this partner. I'm glad I have a donor who is willing and able and makes an attempt to understand me on a unique level.
One of the most important things to remember about having to feed off the energy of another is to be discerning of who you are taking from. It makes natural sense that feeding from the weak, elderly, or sick has its own repercussions. I don't think it's right to feed off children or to drain people who need their own energy at least as badly as you do.
But what about those who are normal in energy level? It's still important to test the emotional waters of the person you feed from. As a link is forged, you take in their emotions along with the vital life-force that sustains. In a way, I believe that you may experience a strong sense of "walking in their shoes".
Let me give a long winded example. There is someone in a training class who just moved from Cali to make a step upwards to the role of tech support. There are 13 of us in class and she did a wonderful job of establishing herself as the class "know-it-all". She has succeeded in annoying everyone, myself included. She's very high on herself...so it would seem.
Naturally, I made the ill-decision to establish a feeding line early on this week. It wasn't a mistake in the pure sense of "needing to feed". I had already decided to enter a testing phase for my newly established sense of self. Now the problem is: I understand her a lot better. And I feel damned sorry for her. I can feel her emotions as strongly as if they were mine. While this is indeed a good sign in terms of acknowledging the ability to form a link to draw from, it's also a lesson in being picky about the emotional state of a being. She's really sad and feels isolated and from this, stems her overwhelming need to establish herself in class.
As a psi, I have found it possible to empathize with others in excruciating detail when needed or even unconsciously. Handy to have when doing readings. But disruptive in other times.
It has to be possible to ground the emotions of another and retain just the energy. Filter perhaps?
Don't get me wrong, I still will post in my other journal as well, but on this path I'm going to start using this journal probably more often than the other one.
I've been having troubles with the balancing act of feeding/ maintaining lately. I think that the main cause is stress in my life. Stress means I usually don't meditate the way I would ordinarily. No meditation means that I'm not managing my energy very well.
Though I am classifying as a psi-vampire, I am very much an energy worker. I work with crystals and stones. I've studied them more in depth in terms of storing energy. Think of it like storing blood in the refrigerator for emergencies... the psi-vamp way.
As a creature attuned to energy, I have discovered that it is indeed possible to store energy into crystals. It's kind of like charging them with energy, only there's no true intent. It's just pouring in energy. Some crystals retain energy quite well. My quartzes are really good for that, smoky quartz especially (for me).
I'm testing the theory that if one charges a crystal with their energy a little bit at a time, it can be used as an energy source come a true emergency. I have heard it said that stones and objects don't usually maintain the levels of energy that would be needed by a psi-vamp if he/she should get into dire need for energy. I'm not trusting to theory that a crystal would be any better than any other object, but it's something to consider at least. Maybe more to the point, by being in contact with the crystal every day, I am cycling energy in a more efficient way between feedings.
For those who are wondering, I have posted this LJ as a gathering point for psychic vampyres across the net to gather and post topics or journal entries about being a psychic vampyre. I hope in the coming weeks to include links to other useful sites and some messageboards I have found in the last years ala Google.
If you are a psychic vampyre, add this community to your list. If you are a friend of a psychic vampyre, join in. If you are just curious, join the group and someone here will answer your question as best they can.
~Note from the moderator~ This is not a vampyre bashing community and all members will be welcomed. Neither I nor anyone else in this community has a say as far as who is and who isn't a "real" vampyre. If you know the signs of psychic vampirism and you believe that you are; you are. No one here will be threatened or disparaged. Anyone caught doing so will be summarily banned from the community. There, you've been warned.